Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
