it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
