I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
