I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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