What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
