the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
