i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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