at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
