I murdered the dance floor call the cops
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
