How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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