Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?