Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Randomize
