i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
