and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Mom said you looked used
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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