we have pet lesbian snakes
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
