I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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