I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
