How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
she peed on how many people?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
