Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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