I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
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birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
tell me about the fingering
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