so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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