I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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