why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
