oh god the rape fog is back!
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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