well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
