I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
