I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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