I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
