This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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