i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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