guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
