I cockslap morals
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
