I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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