dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
