I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
