white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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