I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
