fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
