FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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