Christians are straight up FREAKS
On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
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He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
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it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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