...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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