You work out of a Hotel?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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