That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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