these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
