She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
