I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize