My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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