Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.

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(949): View more from California

Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way

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(906): View more from Michigan

Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?

(1-906): View more from Michigan

It's okay.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

porn star boner night. come get it.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(804): View more from Virginia

I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.

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(813): View more from Florida

You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.

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(916): View more from California

That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt

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(970): View more from Colorado

I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?

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