RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Randomize
