I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I need to calm my uterus...
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
